Dealing with it: Break-ups...

Growing up is a breeze... while you're hitting those geber milestones.  But shortly thereafter parts of it start to suck MAJOR D!!! (((EYE ROLL))) Responsibilities begin to creep up, you're body starts giving out, and life starts to be less about you and more about those around you!!!

Now, don't trip!!! i'm not saying everyday of the rest of your life is gonna suck after you learn how to walk n talk... but i am saying mommy and daddy won't be able to make everything better... they might be able to console you and give you guidance but you are now officially responsible for the follow thru of actually making it better!!!

One of the many things that YOU will have to "fix" is yourself... after a BREAK UP!!! Everyone is bound to go thru one... it doesn't matter whether you're; taking a break, calling it quits- for good, the cheater, the one cheated on, innocent or guilty, you're going to have to make an adjustment to a routine you became accustomed to, and its not always easy.

So, first things first... no one likes getting hurt, so be grateful that the person who chose to hurt you will no longer be a part of your day to day. You should NEVER want to be with a person who doesn't want to be with you, so be thankful that you are not wasting your time or energy and be proud you were able to recognize your own self-worth!!!  And don't let the fact that one person d*cked you over, overshadow all the people that actually love and adore you!!!

There is nothing wrong with losing your sh*t... scream, cry, yell, BUT get it out of your system. Holding it in is stupid and will only make you miserable. Of course everyone wants you to be strong but it is almost always easier said then done... So don't sacrifice your sanity to stay "strong" for the public eye.

Break ups are the perfect topic for ice-cream conversations, but you choose who gets the scoop!!! If you share the details of your break up with anyone, they should only be there to love and support you...  If they don't agree w/ it, think its your fault, or start to talk down to you because of it in anyway then hit them w/ the deuces too!!! You need to start this new life on the right foot and anybody who isn't on board should get LEFT behind.

You don't need to know how they're doing. Let those around you know in advance that you don't want to hear about your EX, period!!! If anyone runs up to you talking about, "guess who i ran into," or "guess who i saw them with," and it pertains to your old boo, you need to cut that convo-QUICK!!! Cause really, why do you even want to hear about them... they aren't a party of your life any more!!! Maybe sometime in the future you'll be able to hear about them and it won't have any effect on you but its never a good idea after a fresh break up!!!

Keep it real with yourself!!! You are more then likely going to want to contact the person, so take it one day at a time. Promise yourself that you won't have any contact w/ them at all for one entire day and stick to it. Repeat that step for a minimum of 2 weeks... By the end of that second week you will be able to look back and realize; it went by pretty quickly and life w/ out them isn't that hard!!!

Stay busy!!! Now, there is no doubt that when you get blind-sided w/ a break up its easy for your mind to mistake 10 minutes for 10 days and 1 day can easily feel like FOREVER so be sure to keep yourself occupied.  Do things that help you re-focus your attention on you!!! Give yourself a mani/pedi, pluck your brows, get a hair cut, style your hair differently, try something new w/ your make up, hit the gym, do whatev it takes to keep your mind busy... before you know it a whole day will have passed you by. You'll feel refreshed and look cute ;)

Drowning out the noise isn't fixing sh*t... Smoking, boozin, n partying are all temporary fixes that can sometimes lead to long-term issues. There are plenty of "healthier" alternatives (((family,your kids, excersize))) that will keep you distracted and won't make you end up on an episode of intervention, so choose wisely!!!

Don't get out of one bad situation just to start another!!! I know... I know... It may seem like the greatest distraction of all, but DON'T jump back into the game and pull an automatic re-bound, cause that's a cluster fucc of problems all on its own. You need to get right w/ yourself FIRST.

The most important thing to remember is relationships end... all the time!!! No matter what the circumstances were that lead you to the breaking point don't allow yourself to be a dwelling dummy!!! At some point or another the person made you smile... be appreciative of those times and what you learned about yourself in a relationship. Walk away knowing exactly what you do and don't want out of a future relationship. Count your blessings and make sure to let all future prospects know to either LOVE YOU or LEAVE YOU ALONE ;)